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Penny for a Pooch, Sir
 Is there no depth that charity workers will not plumb, to turn a coin? I saw Amica collecting money for a so called "hotel for dogs". My suspicions were aroused by her claims that each kennel would be equipped with, "Satellite TV" and all dogs would be given a, "Full English breakfast every day!" Also she said that a dog, "Would phone you every week!" Do I look stupid? I know a dog's paw is far too big to operate a keypad on any phone let alone an IPhone! Anyway, after some close questioning, it transpired that Amica was actually working for a stinking scumbag, who was in fact pocketing all the money that poverty stricken pensioners thought, was going abandoned dogs! Amica broke down in tears when I pointed out the error of her ways and managed to convince her that she should take the path.